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They set up the labor room like a stage. All the lights are out, except for one shining spotlight that is pointed right at your hoo-ha. The only people in the room are a couple of nurses, the doc and of course hubby on your right.

It wasn’t what I pictured. I know on TV it always shows the husbands holding the wife’s hand but that was my first realization at how fake that is because your hands are COVERED with wires, an annoying IV needle, blood pressure pads, etc. There’s no way he can hold my hand with all that around my fingers, wrists and hands! We started to push somewhere at around 1:45pm. My legs were up on stirrups and I was able to clench something to push. Then my nurse told me to curl my head, tuck my chin and “bear down.”

Once you feel a contraction happening, you go with the flow and push. However, it takes a few pushes to know exactlywhere to push. For one, you don’t need to clench your whole body… you only need to push in one area but it takes awhile to figure that out. I knew when my pushes were being efficient and I knew when my push was a piece of crap. I could actually feel exactly how the doctor helps you deliver — they basically just gently push around the “area” where the baby’s head is going to come out of.

Lesson #1: You don’t have to do what the nurses are suggesting. For instance, when I take a poo (sorry TMI) I do not curl my head and tuck my chin to push. But since my nurse told me to do so, that’s what I did. It was not natural to me. It didn’t occur to me until a couple pushes in that I could say to the nurse “Can I not do that? Can I do something else?” My “way” of pushing is to lean back and push, and that’s when the baby popped right out!

Lesson #2: You experience a state of euphoria when the baby comes out… it’s crazy! I remember hearing myself moan a weird moan and thinking “is that me?” After one giant push, I knew that everything came out and immediately a feeling of euphoria washed over me, as well as a wave of emotions and feelings of intense relief. The baby started crying and now there was another human in the room!  I could not stop sobbing when they placed the baby on me and I continued to sob for minutes after. I’m not sure why… relief and happiness? I will never forget what that felt like!

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Lesson #3: They place the baby on your chest for some skin-to-skin time… and it’s not always perfect. I didn’t get the wave of “AWWW THIS IS MY BABY AND I LOVE YOU!” I was really surprised at how BIG the baby was and how this was just inside of me! It felt more like a foreign object (a squirming foreign object) was placed on you and you are expected to be OK with it. It was… awkward and weird… but still I’m sobbing and trying to soak it all in. Everyone is doing something — doc is sewing you up (which I can feel but with no pain) and the nurses are bustling around… the husband is taking pictures and you’re holding a squirmy crying baby on your chest in a somewhat awkward position. They call this the “golden hour” even though it feels more like the twilight zone! (Luckily since I am no fan of blood and guts, I didn’t see ANY of that!)

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After awhile, I sobered up and they took my little one to get measured and weighed. Then my family came in to meet little C. (Look at how many things are attached to my hand! How can anyone hold my hand?!)

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The aftermath and the expression of new parents. (UHHH WHAT THE HELL.)

Our chunky monkey champion showing his guns at 7 lbs 11 oz at 2:01 PM.

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I’m a pretty simple city girl.  I love discussing the arts, pondering about human society, looking at pictures of my cat and everything about beauty related things. If there’s anything more surprising to my friends about me, it’s that I recently became a mom. I’m not exactly kid friendly but I believe in family values and wanted to venture to a new life stage with my loving husband of 7ish years. Here’s to the future of poopy diapers and figuring out this crazy thing called life.

You can find this story and other great posts about C’s life as a new mom on her blog dramaticmelodies. She has the word dramatic in her blog title, CLEARLY she and I are meant to be friends!  🙂

Who can relate to these lessons?  Isn’t her chunky monkey adorable!?!

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