So I’ve heard two major themes about having a second child. One is that your life is complete chaos at the beginning and two, that it’s actually not that bad. Or rather, its not as tough as going from zero children to one. It makes sense because zero to one kid is a bigger life change than one to two kids but I guess I will have to wait and find out.
When your second (or third, or fourth) child enters the world, you are a more confident parent, and you have figured out what works for you and what doesn’t. Plus, you have successfully managed to raise one child up until now, so that should count for something, right?
Ironically The Scottish and I feel a bit more nervous about the newborn days this time around because we know what to expect. We are anxious in specific ways instead of the generalized scary feelings we felt before The Wee One was born. But as much the sleep deprivation, painful breastfeeding, consoling a newborn, and loss of independence are difficult, at least this time we know it is only a tiny blip in our lives. Children are always changing and each day we will see more and more personality from our sweet baby boy.
Because I’m a planner, and a dreamer I made a list of things I want to do again with baby #2, things I want to skip, and things I want to try that are newish to me. I can only assume none of this will happen because life is never what we expect and it’s impossible to predict. That said, here it is anyway. 🙂
Nursing on demand– this felt so difficult at first but ended up being really easy after a few months. Nursing was my go-to when The Wee One would start fussing and it was great bonding for us. He’s still a great eater and I hope the next baby is too!
Avoiding Co-sleeping– The Scottish has always been adamant about not co-sleeping and if we can, we’d like to keep our bed child-free next time as well.
Showering everyday- I have no idea if this is possible with two kids but I am person who needs a shower to wake up (which means I can’t shower at night after the babies are in bed). I feel mentally prepared for the day after a shower, and I really like that clean feeling.
Struggling through Taking monthly photo shoots- these are precious to me now and I’m so glad we remembered to do a photo shoot of The Wee One each month of his first year. And this time around we’ll have to take a brother photo each month too, adorable!
Routine, structure, and schedule- However you want to say it, it worked for us. Who knows if it will work with our next child but they say kids like structure and repetition so we’ll be giving it a try. Unfortunately for second children they end up going with the schedule of their older sibling but hey, it’s still something!
Wait a full month to use a pacifier- I think we will assess how feeding is going first but we won’t wait as long to use one if things are going well.
Documenting the first two months of nursing sessions- Last time I used an app on my phone and started a timer each time I nursed, also noting which side he was on. I even tried to chart wet and dirty diapers but I can’t see myself having time for that this time around and I’m hoping I can sort of get into a routine without documenting everything.
Baby wearing more often– With The Wee One I gave up baby wearing because he never seemed to enjoy it and was pretty fussy when in a carrier. Looking back I wish I would have pushed through the fussiness and kept at it. This time I hope to use my Ergo and Moby a lot more because letting baby sleep on me on the couch won’t be an option with an older brother running around!
Pumping less often- On the one hand, I was able to make such a great stash of freezer milk last time, as well as donate some to a friend so it was totally worth it but will it be worth it the second time? All the hassle of being attached to the pump, cleaning the parts, storing the milk, etc., does not sound appealing.
Filling in baby’s first year calendar as I go- Last time The Mother gave me one of those baby calendars where you add stickers and write notes about all the “firsts” in their lives. Well, The Wee One was already 6 months old or so when I got it so I had to go backwards to fill it out and as an anal perfectionist I had to fill it out as completely as possible. This was really stressful for me, so with baby boy #2 I want to have the calendar in advance and leave it on my dresser to document as I go.
Put cleaning at the bottom of the list- Babies are only small for this tiny amount of time. And cleaning is something that will always be around (unfortunately). I’m a neat freak who likes to organize and clean as I go but I would love to be able to let the house get a tad messy if that meant more special moments with my boys.